“Representation of the most forgotten and exploited”-Che
I am working in Honduras at a impoverished school and couldn’t agree more with this post.
You see them everywhere..
Waiting tables, sweeping the stairs,
They are our future, yet we hardly care!
Children sleeping on the streets..
Children working just so they can eat…
The world’s ought not to be so unfair…
They have a right to study..
They have a right to live a life without care…
Let children be children..
In the quiet of this dusty little town in Honduras my thoughts are so loud, at times I can remember exactly how my past sounded. Many said when I up and quit my job left my family I was running, well I was I was running into the arms of a very uncertain future. A still very uncertain future I know that I am not destined for dress up jobs and lunch dates and corporate emails so what am I destined for. Well I’m hoping these next eight months will bring me to that perfect path. I’m thirty years old I’ve lived many lives some happy some sad. I’ve been destroyed and I have destroyed. Now my path is simply to let go and begin loving for me and what my desire is. Whether its to disappear into a world were a hug is all anyone really needs nothing fancy nothing shinny just a simple “you matter to me”
Thanks for reading.
I live to sin, to kill myself I live; no longer my life my own, but sins. My good is given to me by heaven and God, my evil by myself, by free will, of which I am deprived-
I am sure many of you have seen this on the bumper of a car or stuck to a computer maybe. I stared at this sticker on the bumper of a car a while ago while sitting in traffic and wondered is this possible is “coexist” I am volunteering at a bilingual school in Cofradia Honduras and there are 10 teachers from the United States and Europe and I have noticed we can barely coexist. I watch the dynamic and can’t help but laugh at how we just cant seem to get past our own agendas and place the school first. Now this is a small group of strangers working for the same thing, the education of children. So how are we suppose to expect all governments and people to “coexist” just food for though.
This a hard post to publish, I’ve wanted to post this for some time now and just didn’t have the nerve to. How to be seen differently when you have been seen the same for so long. We as individual humans are perceived a certain way Our family and close friends see us a certain way because they know us. A stranger sees us from the outside not the inside because they don’t yet know us. We wear different masks for different people but there are those few people that see past the masks because they know us or at least they think they do.
We allow people to see what we want them to see and on occasion they see more than we want them to see and I have realized this is okay. So who am I and how do people see me. I asked a friend of mine once how she saw me her answer was interesting she said “beautiful, but together, strong and someone that cares to much” and all these things are true and they are all the things I want people to see. Now I asked another friend of mine the same question this friend is a little more blunt she said I am a runner(let me explain I run away from things, people and places), have tendencies to hurt people, a bit cold, detached, and I care to much”. While both friends are correct in what they see, are they correct because I allow them to see these things? We allow people even those closest to us to see us a certain way.
I learned a hard lesson this week people are not the same as we once remember them, we hold on to these ideas and what people are and who they are that we forget we all change we are not the same. So we begin to see people even those closest to us differently good or bad they are different. I am different and I haven’t been accepting this. Maybe out of fear of disappointing but things happen in our lives that changes us, they alter us and I have to accept this. I am no longer who I was I am different. Being strong isn’t something that comes easy to me, I can’t shrug off a hurt like I could in the past and I actually do hurt. I remember thinking how easy it is to forgive I was quick to forgive people even if they continued to hurt me I just liked being a forgiving person and now I’ve lost this very beautiful part of me a part that I held on to for dear life. I know I can be and will be a forgiving person it just doesn’t come as easy and that is different to me and about me.
We wear masks lots of pretty masks and lots of ugly masks full masks and half masks. Some of those masks are no longer just masks they are actually now who we are. Be careful which masks you allow to become more than just a mask its a hard thing when you loose a part of you.
“We understand how dangerous a mask can be. We all become what we pretend to be.” -Patrick Rothfuss, The Name of the Wind